Why is it that something as simple as caring for ourselves can feel so difficult?
We all need rest, silence, or space. But instead, we often choose to answer one more message, say yes when we want to say no, or postpone what truly helps us feel well. When this becomes a habit, stress builds—and may slowly become chronic—because our needs remain unmet.
Over time, a growing pattern of negative or self-critical thoughts, emotional tension, and physical discomfort become the new normal, gradually putting our mental and overall health at risk.
But eventually, we notice that something is not right. We begin to consider putting ourselves first—and that is when something inside resists. That feeling is often guilt—quiet, subtle, sometimes even paralysing, and undoubtedly strong.
The most helpful response when guilt arises as we try to care for ourselves is not to fight it, but to meet it with self-compassion.
Self-compassion means recognising your own emotional needs and offering yourself the same kindness you so often extend to others. It means remembering that you matter, too.
Why Do I Feel Guilty When I Take Care of Myself?
From a psychological perspective, guilt like this often comes from early beliefs: that love must be earned through sacrifice, that others’ needs come first, or that caring for yourself is a sign of selfishness. These beliefs tend to operate quietly in the background—until we pause and start to notice them.
This reflection is part of a larger conversation from the talk “When I Take Care Of Myself I Feel Guilty” which you can explore here.
You will also find below a short guided meditation—around 10 minutes—to help you gently connect with these emotions and approach them with self-compassion.
Learn more about our Mindfulness-Based Interventions or explore other mental wellness resources.
I hope you found this useful!
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If you’re looking for personalized support using evidence-based strategies to help increase your mental health and overall wellbeing, please don’t hesitate to reach out. I’m here, to help.
Olga-Lucía from EQness